So many ways to begin - Jon Mcgregor

An unusual title was what had attracted me to this book. "So many ways to begin" by Jon McGregor turned out to be one of the best books I have ever read and has made my top-10 list.
Written in an amazingly simple and unassuming prose, this book does not purport to do anything great. The author does not use highly stylized, lyrical sentences nor does it have an engaging story line. In fact, it is the story of the ordinary life. What makes it incredible, is the narrative. Short chapters constructed around a keepsake or memory object from the protagonist's life describe in excruciatingly beautiful detail mundane and everyday things which puts you in the front row seat to this show. It might as well be your life the author is describing.
The vivid descriptions of the verdant Irish countryside or the bleak landscape of the dock towns of Scotland vie for attention with the description of a gesture, a look of lost love, a moment when that crucial choice was made. In fact, it is these seemingly routine choices that turn out to be at the heart of this story, like it so often is in real life. Even without laying out every single detail of the scene, the author manages to tug at the soul of the crisis in each one of them - the devastation of World War II, the ecstasy of true love, the agony of giving up a child or the darkness of a depressed spouse. This book did not make me cry nor did it make me laugh. What it did is make me nod in agreement at the end of almost all the chapters. In keeping the edges murky almost sfumato, the attention is drawn to the details and what emerges is a beautiful portrait of everyday life and extraordinary people.
A definite 5/5.

WALL-E

The good people at Pixar have done it again. Just when the dust was settling from Cars and Ratatouille, here is WALL-E. Though not as thrilling, fast and exciting as the former or sophisticated and story-oriented as the latter, the slow pace and the impassive "faces" of the characters make it easy to imbibe the spirit of this movie. A very strong message is highlighted by carefully though out details like the dark, dull color of earth instead of the usual green as seen from space, the dark oceans, the space junk, slush river and the omnipresent trash compared to the sanitary and robotic yet "peaceful" existence of the people aboard the space cruise liner.
By far the steal of the movie is the adorable Wall-E. It doesn't have the spunk or charm of Lightning McQueen or the rustic hillbilly enthusiasm of 'Mater but the almost expressionless binocular eyes exude pure innocence - almost like that of a newborn baby. Contrast it with the "know-it-all" aura surrounding his friend, EVE, and you have yourself an irresistible pair.
The storyline could have been developed a little more and the pace is slow, but the effort is valiant and so is the theme. My 4 year old son stayed up way past his bedtime to finish the movie and that is a big indicator of the charm of this movie to an audience that does not really get the save-the-Earth message.
A good watch - 3.5/5.

Wild hogs!

Just watched "Wild Hogs" starring Tim Allen, John Travolta, Martin Lawrence, William H.Macy and others. It is an outrageously hilarious movie, an unpretentious commentary on the proverbial "male midlife crisis" and a very down-to-earth response to it. It is certainly a biker movie, with shades of a Western to it, but at heart it is a feel-good comedy with anyone can identify with. The casting is excellent as each character is brought to life especially by the 4 lead actors. I particularly enjoyed the excellent timing of William H.Macy as Dudley, the Geek who gets his fairly tale princess at the end. Also Ray Liotta as Jack "Del Fuego" personifies all the stereotypes that pop culture has set on "biker dudes". A brisk pace, witty dialogues and beautiful picturisation of the open road and the heartland make this movie extremely enjoyable. It even has its version of Mayberry - Madrid NM (pronounced May-drid) complete with the predictable Chili festival, a sheriff who doesn't carry firearms and their favourite pastime, bull-slapping!
The piece de resistance - other than the stunning Marissa Tomeii - is a glimpse of William H. Macy's pale, shrunken, naked butt!
Highly recommended to drive away all your workweek, hard day blues. Definitely a must-see!

The first time......

The thrill and excitement (and subsequent memories) of doing something for the first time cannot be beaten. And along with the most obvious ones like the first kiss, the first car, the first house, the first childbirth, the first time you ever ate a good dish also makes for some wistful thinking. And for me, the memories usually include the taste, the place, the company and best of all, the smell of what I ate.I am going to try to catalog some of my fondest food memories, yet.

- Kahlua coffee - spring break 1999, charleston, south carolina with K and E

- Long Island Iced tea - nobody makes it better than the Outback Steak house on Thousand oaks Blvd in Thousand Oaks, CA and that too with the Kokkaburra wings...Friday nights after work, just me and my honey!!

- Tandoori Chicken - from some iranian cafe at Crawford Market,Bombay with my aai sometime in June/July 1993. Nothing better to wash off the depression of seeing your lifelong dream of becoming a doctor shattered to pieces than polishing off a whole chicken sitting inside a pure veg udipi Hotel Sadanand.

-to be continued.

Festival foods

I had been looking for a project to keep my brain occupied in between the numerous feedings, diaper changes, homework and story sessions. Tomorrow is Ganesh chaturthi and before i got married, it was a big deal in our household, especially in my ajji's house. And that got me thinking about, what else ?, food! Specifically, special food made during festivals. So I have decided to collect recipes from the various regions of India (and if possible outside too) of dishes that are made specially during special occasions or festivals. I think starting with "modak" for ganesh chathurthi will be a good idea. I will try to make it this weekend and post it.

Baby update, 1 month late!!!

So the little one is 6 months old!and looking at her, it seems like she cant wait to breeze through the next 6 too! She is sitting very well now and lately has started crawling very well too. What started off as pushing with her knees to propel forward, progressed in a matter of days to crawling confidently on all fours!! and how fast! It is as if new connections are made in her brain every second. and I am sure they are. that makes it even more important to stimulate her in all ways possible by exposing her to new experiences all the time.

She has started eating semi solid food too. started off with the usual boiled and mashed apple and then to mashed rice, moong dal and today tried a combination of rice and dal with just a tad bit of salt. and she loved it!! heard a good tip from one of the other mommies and so dry roasted the dal and the rice separately, after washing them and then pulsed it in the food processor. That way it can be stored in the fridge and is easier to cook the tiny amounts that she needs to prevent wastage.I am trying to do it homemade and natural, will ward off gerbers, cerelac et al as long as I can.

Really interesting thing happened today. E and I were playing with his playdough and baby a was watching us from a higher vantage point. we were fooling around and I started to wail loudly though playfully and made sad faces and then looked at her. After looking at me for about 5 seconds the poor thing started to cry in such a heart wrenching manner that I didn't know whether to be amazed at her reaction or smack myself for making her cry. but it was really cool!! since e's birth I have read a couple of very good books on the brain development in babies and i am amazed to see all those theories being acted out for real! She certainly mirrored the emotion that she saw on my face!

Terror struck? Of course!!!

In case anyone is interested, the terrorists have certainly succeeded in their namesake mission-of terrorizing people. Since we have been here-in the last year and half- there have been 10 major bombings in India, including 2 in Hyderabad. Whenever I make plans to go to what might be a popular or crowded place, that is the first thing that comes to my mind. We have started organizing our daily plans around what is happening in the country in general and particularly in our town. This certainly was not us and that is why I say that as far as we are concerned, the terrorists have succeeded.

Did two things today that I had told myself, I would never do:

1. Succumbed to the temptation of "naukarshahi" and now have a maid stay 8 hours with me (she even made rotis today)
2. Bought 2 pirated Indian editions of books that were on my list. My only excuse is that the two authors are not at all indigent by worldly standards and will not notice this infraction.

Shame, Shame!!

Comments on E's school

E is in kindergarden, now. School started last week and we haven't had any major upsets or tantrums yet. Not that I anticipated any problems, really. Even when started Montessori the day after he turned two, it took him only a few days to get used to being there the whole day and away from us. He used to cry just a little bit and as soon as he saw the teacher and his class room and most importantly, the other kids, he would be his cheery self again. This time around, the most exciting thing has been the school bus. He wants to go in the school bus and as we have decided that we will drive him to and from the school, he is immensely disappointed. All he wants to do is go to school and come back in his big school bus! He is properly outfitted in his "Cars" school bag, "Ben 10" lunch box and "Power Rangers" water bottle. Talk about consumerism!! I remember a piece on NPR that talked about advertising to kids and how successful and dangerous( to the kids and their parents' pocket) it is and now I am seeing it in action.
So, P drops him off in the morning and I go to pick him up, along with Baby A ofcourse. The 35-40 minute ride gives me a much needed sit down time during the day and I find myself composing the next post for the blog. More often than not it is a tirade against something or the other that has happened around me, lately it has been about my struggles with the household help and E's school. The former deserves a post for itself, so here it will be about his school.

We found this school as a temporary place for him till we get him into a "proper" school starting next year. I did not want to make this vital decision without doing due diligence( VC speak!!) on all available options. We had talked to the promoter of this school along with the principal and found them to be very enthusiastic and well-informed educators. So we decided to go with this one. So far, it has only been a week and it doesn't seem too bad, as far as the teaching methods and activities as concerned. Yesterday, I reached a little ahead of time and decided to wait outside his classroom. Here, as with everywhere else in India, there is a lack of proper procedures and discipline as far as the working of the school is concerned. There is no waiting area for the parents or caregivers so you can walk right up to the child's class room. Yes the door is closed but security of the children seems to be the last thing on the agenda. The school is housed on an old kothi (mansion) with thick stone walls and a period architecture. But that also means it needs regular upkeep which we Indians are really bad at. The place has a very shabby look which is out of place for a school. In the class room, there are no cubbys or shelves for the children's backpacks, so they all end up in a heap in one corner. The furniture is all wooden, painted in bright colours which is a welcome change from the industrial metal, rusted furniture we saw at some of the other "preschools". The floor however is quite dirty and definitely can use a foam mat where the children will feel comfortable.
Yes, all these things seem superficial and one can argue that it doesn't necessarily affect what is taught in that classroom. Maybe so, but it is this attention to detail that makes a place stand apart from the rest. When it comes to children, steps should be taken to make the environment feel cosy and welcoming instead of stark and utilitarian. This carries on over to all walks of life in our society. That probably explains why there is no sense of customer service in the services sector and no employee in any business seems to know any of the soft skills that are an integral part of the Western marketplace. If you do not experience it all your life, how can you be expected to impart it to others?

Mid year update

I had written this as my contribution to the family magazine, a wonderful idea proposed by cousin H in pune. Just putting it up here to enable me to keep track....

This time last year, I was congratulating myself and Eeshan on successfully completing the project marking the end of his babyhood – potty training. We had been back in the homeland for only a couple of months and were still getting used to doing things the desi way. Parth had already joined ISB and was well into the world of late night assignments, last minute projects, classes and exams. Eeshan and I were pretty much on our won and left to find new friends and things to do in the beautiful 260 acre campus in Hyderabad. We had worked out a good schedule for play and a little bit of work for Eeshan and I was determined to enjoy my new found status as housewife and more importantly, full time mother after working full time for 5 years. Little did I know that, in less than a year, the term full time mother will redefine itself for me.

So, on the 23^rd day of January 2008 we were blessed with a beautiful baby girl whom we named Anika. I was in Pune with Aai and Baba and my lovely Eeshan to keep me company and Janoo from Nagpur had flown in to help us out. Things turned out very well and all of my fears about Eeshan having adjustment issues with the new baby turned out to be baseless. Now-a-days, he goes around talking about “my bab y sister” and “my kuchu muchu” – his nickname for her- all day . Baby Anika is doing well and is starting to develop a personality. She is an easy-going baby as long as she is the center of everybody’s world. Thankfully she has her doting brother and and an even-more doting father to pamper her.

Parth graduated from ISB on the 5^th of April successfully fulfilling a long held desire and countless hours of tireless dedication. During the job search, he got 3 offers and decided to go with a venture capital firm based out of Hyderabad. This enabled him to put his pharmacy background and his training in finance to the best use. He is enjoying his work.

As for me, after the first two months of whirlwind activity when Anika and I were still getting to know each other, I had to tackle the mammoth job of moving into a new apt and unpacking. This chore however was made light by Parth, who had to do a lot of work himself since I always went in with two more members of the family, who weren’t necessarily productive. But a few late nights and a lot of patience later, we are all set in the apartment and are also into a good routine. I even have a couple of hours of “free” time during the day when I can sit down and think about doing something other than mothering. The issue of exercising to get rid of the pregnancy pounds and a few leftover ones from the earlier years always raises its ugly head but I have been successful at avoiding it so far. I have been experimenting a lot with my cooking and plan to codify all my results and someday have something to show for this great love of my life. Eeshan starts school soon and that will be another turning point in our family and the next update I write will start off with the first day of school for Eeshan Chakrabarti.

Till then, be well and keep in touch.

E and his cartoons

Yes, E watches TV albeit in, what we think is, moderation. And he is already well-versed in pop culture as far as the world of cartoons is concerned. Gone are the days of Elmo and Lightning McQueen. E has his heart set on Perman and Ninja Hattori and let me tell you, these manga are cute!! And cuter than that is how E sings the title songs of these two serials and a couple of other songs too. I have become hooked to Pokemon, now. I can see what the craze is all about - that Pikachu is cho chweet!!!
Coming back to E's songs, he hums a few hindi songs too now, like the songs fron Taare Zameen Par, "dard-e-disco" aankhon mein teri"etc. Then there are his Digimon frontier dialogs - "digi's parents.....andeluscious", that is what it sounds like!! (It is supposed to be Digi spirits -evolution!!) He is very good at imitating words from other languages and also other kids.
Ms. A is doing well, though today has been a little dull as she has cold and slight fever. But she is in her good spirits as usual. Got her next round of shots and is doing quite well. She does not like to lie down and prefers to be either on her tummy or sit up in our laps. We (E and I) have named her 'Anikamon' after our newest addiction to pokemon.
Mamu started work this week and is looking for a house. Now all he needs is a 'good girl' to settle down with and he will be set.
Pishi is enjoying life in Deutschland, checking out guys, wines and food - not necessarily in that order.
Things are rolling along just well in our neck of the woods.

Mango poisoning

Neither of us had ever felt like this before! No, we have not fallen in love all over again (though that is a regular occurrence in our life) but something we both experienced this Sunday.
So, after 10 years of not enjoying mangoes in summer -a quintessential Indian summer tradition - P and I decided this year to devour this royal fruit like never before. Apart from the evergreen Alphonso and omnipresent Baiganpalli, we had discovered Himayat, a really fragrant and fleshy variety of this high calorie delight. And needless to say, mangoes have been a permanent fixture on our dinner table for the last couple of weeks. E loved it too so we had just the perfect excuse to bring some more home.
Sunday morning, P started saying that he was very hot and felt like heat was radiating from his face. Well, it was very hot and we thought P was just reacting to it. Then, I started to feel very hot and almost burning sensations on my face and the tips of my fingers and toes. As it started to get worse and both of us felt the same way, we were sure it was the masala that I had used to make mutton curry that morning. but after a blistering,miserable day as we settled down for the night, P had an idea! It might just be the mangoes!! Considering how Ayurveda consideres mango to have "heating property" it was the perfect explanation! We had a big laugh and have imposed a week-long moratorium on mangoes in the household. I can't wait till the week is over.

So, I have decided that i will write once a week, every Monday night. At the rate that E and A are growing up, if i am not sincere in this endeavour, i will surely regret it in a few years. It is really difficult to believe sometimes that these two are my babies. They are absolutely gorgeous, in every sense of the word. E has started talking about what he wants to be when he grows up and consistently has mentioned astronaut. He is going to the moon because there is a scary monster in the moon and he is going to fight it! and then A is also going to join him in the rocket and go with him. he plays with her so well, it is adorable. the only worry i have is to make sure he plays with her gently because he cannot tell the difference between playing with her and his other friends. he hugs and kisses her all the time and wants to play with her and is quite protective of her too.but then something turns on in his small little head and he pulls her hairs or pulls at her ankle or worse, bites her! and so everytime A screams, which is very very often, we yell at E and most of the times, the poor thing is at the other end of the room.
He has been talking about girlfriends!! yeah a little early for me, but i don't think he really knows what that means. He certainly has a sly smile on his face when he says that, but if asked some more, he usually talks about something else. The other day, we were talking and i said i need a boyfriend too and he was quick to point out that i should get a manfriend not a boyfriend. he is an absolute riot. this last week he had fun with mama, nandini, and the girls. with mama he could do a lot of roughhousing and he thoroughly enjoyed it. his name for mama is Time Out Ajo.
It is cool to see how E uses language. He is always trying new words, whether he really comprehends them or not. His new word now a days is Horrible, though he says inhorrible as in "she is inhorrible". he now tells stories all the time and they all start with "once upon a time" and end with "....and they became good friends".
He is very good a music. He hums songs all day long whether it is the music of the AquaGuard machine or the beep of the elevator, he is always singing. his favourite songs now are "taare zameen par, bum bum bole, om shanti om etc". i will record him singing these songs for they change very quickly.
As for baby A, she is all of 4 months old now though she behaves like she is 6 months old! she is rolling over very well and lately she has been pushing ahead too. and boy does she like to talk! she does not like to be by herself and loves it when people talk to her. her hairs are growing beautifully and she looks like a total angel. J and C and I have named her "Archies" because she looks like those adorable babies that they have on archies cards where you see chubby cheeks, small eyes and chin and a cute nose! she is a good sport too and loves to go out in the car. she prefers to sleep on her side and that has me worried all the time. she is loud and makes sure she has everybody's attention.
the cooking is going well though need to get into a better routine. sometime things just get a little stressful and it is usually the days when i haven't had a good night's sleep. so i think i haven't really lost it yet! so i think i will get it right this time and write every week. if some thing truly cool happens midweek then ill try to get that in too.
cheerio!!

Memory is an amazing thing, isn't it? One of my patients in Moorpark gave me a book and wrote a note on it that said, "Don't forget to make memories". I thought that was a beautiful idea indeed. We make memories every minute that we are awake but the sad thing i, we do not really recollect all of our memories whenever we want. After such a long time of just thinking about getting back to the blog, tonight i finally did it. and as i was typing the address i thought of the name My Taki and how in a span of under a year my beautiful little 2 year old E who used to say taki to everything that was his now talks about becoming an astronaut and going to the moon - and not just that now he is going there along with his sister who will drive the rocket!! When i try to remember specific things about him just a year ago, it is all foggy. yes, i have beautiful memories of certain events and things he used to say but a general feeling of what he was like has blurred. that is where letters that i have written for him and scrapbooks and pictures come really handy. they help fine tuning these beautiful moments. it is really sad that as the days go by and we make new memories, the old ones get foggier and foggier. so the best thing to do is live each moment to its fullest and enjoy each day, because it sure is not coming back.

On googling Memory i came across this site....pretty cool....
http://www.exploratorium.edu/memory/