Heavenly Hawaii

We are at Maui, in Kihue to be precise. The lobster is done and the rice is cooking in the microwave. Akka just fell asleep and eeshan is ready to eat. went in for a while in to the gorgeous water and have had a vodka and coke and finished a glass of red wine. The fingers are dancing the salsa all over the keyboard and it is registering very slightly in my cortical centers. there is the gorgeous din of massive waves dashing on the shore right outside my back door mixed with the really discordant din of a stupid cartoon that eesh is watching. i am feeling the beautiful effects of the alcohol and had the awesome idea of this post...so here goes.....

The anatomy of the perfect buzz....

It is said that one of the effects alcohol has on your brain is that it inhibits the inhibitory neurotransmitter acetylcholine which in fact makes you a maverick, someone who doesn't care about dotting the i's and crossing the t's or doing the right things at the right moment. Well, right now i am at that precise moment and thought it would be a wonderful opportunity to jot down this feeling when i am there but not quite...when i am....

buzzed enough to feel the pins and needles creeping up my calves but conscious enough that i can load the whole dishwasher and turn it on,

buzzed enough to not give a damn about dipping the lobster tail (a million calories) into clarified butter (a zillion calories) but conscious enough to write about it

buzzed enough to enjoy the solitude of the afternoon, but conscious enough to realize that my most precious creation is sleeping soundly in the bedroom and that is why i am indoors instead of toasting in the gorgeous sun, like my son and my honey.

buzzed enough to enjoy the warm sensation that is passing through my throat and chest as i sip my red wine but conscious enough to realize that this glass is going to take me over the edge

buzzed enough to want to put down a lot of other things in this post but conscious enough to delete them all.....

Hell,maybe am not buzzed at all. what is the point of getting drunk if you are your most sensible and rational self, your most honest alter ego, when you are drunk. i thought the whole point of being under the influence was the you are under the influence of something other than your own thoughts, your own fears, your own monsters. there is no bigger downer than the knowledge that you are thinking so clearly that you have figured our what you want to do in your life in this haze that is surrounding your rational thought. Things that you only imagined yourself doing when you were "sober" suddenly feel like the most natural things that you were supposed to do. Is that why all artists at one point or the other are said to have made their best creations when they were not "sober"? No, i am not advocating the abdication of responsibility and getting high all your life just so that you can realize what your true potential is...you know what that makes you...a COWARD! someone who cannot do what they really want to do unless they lose control of the world around them.,..nah!!! not for me....i am just enjoying my vacation and this awesome state of not being there when i am really there.......(in fact writing all this has had an incredibly potent cleansing effect on my brain that i think i will need another glass of the really nice Cabernet to take me to my new post)...until then.....cheerio!!!!!

So many ways to begin - Jon Mcgregor

An unusual title was what had attracted me to this book. "So many ways to begin" by Jon McGregor turned out to be one of the best books I have ever read and has made my top-10 list.
Written in an amazingly simple and unassuming prose, this book does not purport to do anything great. The author does not use highly stylized, lyrical sentences nor does it have an engaging story line. In fact, it is the story of the ordinary life. What makes it incredible, is the narrative. Short chapters constructed around a keepsake or memory object from the protagonist's life describe in excruciatingly beautiful detail mundane and everyday things which puts you in the front row seat to this show. It might as well be your life the author is describing.
The vivid descriptions of the verdant Irish countryside or the bleak landscape of the dock towns of Scotland vie for attention with the description of a gesture, a look of lost love, a moment when that crucial choice was made. In fact, it is these seemingly routine choices that turn out to be at the heart of this story, like it so often is in real life. Even without laying out every single detail of the scene, the author manages to tug at the soul of the crisis in each one of them - the devastation of World War II, the ecstasy of true love, the agony of giving up a child or the darkness of a depressed spouse. This book did not make me cry nor did it make me laugh. What it did is make me nod in agreement at the end of almost all the chapters. In keeping the edges murky almost sfumato, the attention is drawn to the details and what emerges is a beautiful portrait of everyday life and extraordinary people.
A definite 5/5.